2013 in review

So last year I made a big 13 point goal list. You can read about it here. 2013 goals

Let's just say I didn't quite reach most of these goals. I did read a few books- not 13- but my textbooks count as 2 apiece- so that's 4, then I read Beyond the Badge. I started another...but haven't finished it. Oh- I also read American Sniper.

I do pray for my husband a lot. A whole lot. From the time I wake up to the time I go to bed. 

Dog walking. Ha. Those poor babies need some walks. 

Out of 13 places. I went to: Hilton Head, Miami, Honduras, Belize, Cozumel, Grand Cayman, Boston, Savannah, Statesboro, Tybee, Atlanta, Macon, Lyons, Griffin. Some old- some new. 14. Check. 

Let's look back at our year in review- the things we did do:

January- Purchased the (absolute dreamed up in my head) wedding dress with my mom

February- I think we went out the night before valentines- and just stayed at home for the love day..but I don't remember. 

March- Had the time of our lives on our bachelor and bachelorette parties- I went to Hilton Head with my girls and Kevin took over ATL. 

April-Something happened this month- but I can't put my finger on it. OH that's right- The New Pope was crowned! Me. We had the most awesome wedding with the most perfect weather and the best of friends there to watch us become united. We took a trip of a lifetime and went on the best vacation cruise ever. Cozumel, Belize, Honduras, and Grand Cayman.

May- The Mr. celebrated his first birthday married (and first birthday with me). Cirque de Soleil was a great gift! As a late present I flew him to Boston for a week and let him have a great time while I was at a conference. We also got to meet up with my host family from Connecticut and have a fabulous Italian dinner with them. 


June & July- we played on the lake as much as we could. My husband tried to teach me how to wakeboard- but it isn't for me. We didn't go to the ER this year- so I count that as a plus. We did bust one tube (well the youth did), but I think they had a blast. We also learned that Papa Pope is a maniac when he drives the boat. It is scarily awesome! We did make a trek to Six Flags with the youth and had a great time. 

August- 29 came for me with a 2nd Annual trip to the beach. My parents and my in-laws (and all of our dogs) rented a condo in Tybee to bring it in. Oh- and I started school at Georgia Southern to take some classes- to determine if I want to pursue a higher degree. We got a free trip to Savannah for work and had a good time hanging out with some of Kevin's old Nighthawk buddies. 

September- Georgia Southern Football game. 

October- We took our annual Halloween picture...And went to a UGA game thanks to some friends. 

November- Kevin got his first buck! 8 pointer. We hosted Thanksgiving for my parents, my aunt, and 2 cousins at our house. I made everything but the turkey and some butter beans and peas. I think it went surprisingly well- I was proud of my spread. Kevin was a great help too. We also took a trip down south and blew up a lot of things (the boys did) and hung out with friends. And we didn't go black Friday shopping. A first for me since I was 15 I believe. 

December- Kevin got his 50th DUI arrest for the year, which is awesome. He will get a MADD pin to add to his collection. He also made a first: DUI arrest on a bike. I completed my 2 classes with an A and a B- which I thought was going to be a C..but am super thankful for the Lord working in on that one. 
8 Months of marriage to round out the year. 

I think we have had an amazing start to the rest of our lives. 2013 was pretty great. Here's to hoping for many more memories together!

Friday 1-3

If you read the other day's post, I hope you know that it blessed my heart. What really makes my heart smile is knowing that SO MANY people care about my happiness. 2 of my best friends have told me so much in the past 3 weeks "I am so happy that you are happy!" and "Oh- you dont know what it does to me to know you are happy again!" and one's husband even said it was good to see me happy again. This my readers- is what a true friendship looks like.

To have friends who get HAPPY when YOU are happy. These friends have been through a lot the past couple of months in their own lives, and for them to take a moment out of their personal dealings to wish and bless happiness over me- wow, it is a feeling I cant really explain. It is so cool to know that you truly are loved. Not like in a sob suck face romance love- but a love that can never be broken because of complete understanding of what it means to be a friend. Proverbs 17:17 says that "A friend loves at all times, a brother is born for a time of adversity". All. Times.

This includes the ups- the downs, and the pick yourself up off the floor times. I am grateful for people who TRULY care about my happiness and never try and negate it and take it away from me. From college ministers, to college friends, to people I really have only met once or twice-to people from my church who I thought hated me, to precious best friends- these people are the ones that have been praying me through this trial. And you will never ever ever ever know how awesome it has been to have these prayers wash over me.

I pray I can be that kind of friend. To share in one's happiness and never strangle it out. To support my dearest friends in THEIR times of need. It is so awesome to know people want the best for you. And that when you get it, a small part of them rejoices on the inside because God is so faithful and they got to share in that blessing with you.

So- today is Friday the 13th. My Granny was REAL superstitious and we could never go see her on one of these days- and she had this sign she would do for black cats- and never split a pole if you were walking with her- and she would never walk under ladders. She was very superstitious. (now you are singing that song). I loved my Granny though- she taught me a lot about life. So- to not jinx the day ;) (she is probably rolling over in her grave now) I want you to know that in your times of need- and in your trials- and in the points where you say- I'm over it- know that your truest of friends are praying for your happiness- and praying your through this time in your life. Never steal someone's happiness or try and steal the spotlight for your own life drama when someone else is going through crap. Be there for them, listen to them, give your opinion in a loving way (sometimes you have to be FIRM) and pray them through it.

True happiness comes when those around you experience happiness. And in the moment you share happiness with another- you find yourself a little more complete than you were yesterday.

Yes to Va va va Bbbe SSS!

This week has been a doosy in my personal life, BUT it's the best week of the summer at our church! It is Vacation Bible School!! This is one of the most stressful, crazy, busy, LOUD, frustrating, time taking up rewarding weeks of the year. Oh how my heart swells in me to see little kids loving learning about Jesus. The questions they ask are always bigger than you expect and their smiles are as bright as the moon. This year we did a Rock Star theme- and it has been really awesome. At first I was really hesitant, but thankfully God is bigger than my scoffs and questioning mind.

Here are a few of my personal highlights so far: (I hope you smile wide and laugh hard at these like I did)

 Getting to dress up every night with one of my best friends has been SO FUN! Granted, I could never be a rockstar because I would have some terrible breakage from the amount of teasing of hair that has taken place in my bathroom each night. We plan our rockstar outfits and try and wrangle these kiddies to do some service projects for other people. My teacher voice or (insert choice word) voice has come up a few times, but other than that, it has been AWESOME driving the Tour Bus with Andrea! She is a TRUE true friend, who I have been blessed to share life with.





These sweet 5 and 6 year olds were the quietest class on Monday night. They truly loved making stained glass pieces for the Nursing Home guests. They made beautiful artwork, and learned that they are like this stained glass- when light shines in it, color radiates around, shining in at all angles. When we have Jesus in our hearts, he overflows into our lives and shines in at all angles to make life have color bounce around and over us. Melts my heart.


Other highlights include:
• Seeing these kids get EXCITED about coming to church- there was 105 KIDS at our church last night- don't tell me that doesn't give you chills, because I have them now just typing this. They were at a rock concert singing My Redeemer lives- on these sweet innocent lips- praising the same God I praise. My cup runeth over.
• Getting the kids to have a theme night- and not having to send home papers with them. I said wear crazy hair tomorrow and THEY DID! It was awesome. Last night was star night- and EVERY single kid came in with a star. Even the ones who hadn't been the night before- because their friends told them about it. They had so much excitement to show off their stars. I hope they know they have lit up my life this week.
• In class talking about "Leaning on God" when things don't go our way or we are hurting, I asked the older class if they knew what it was like to get picked on and some raised their hands and without missing a beat- a kid that could pass as Snoop Dogg's son said "somebody pick on me- they gon get tha taste slapped out they mouth", BAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAH!!! Did that really just happen?!? Every adult in the room was dying- and I had to keep a straight face and say- yes that is a great example of that sin word I was just talking about. Oh man, I couldnt help but laugh my head off after he left.
• Same kid, same night: We made salvation bracelets for them to have an easy way to share Jesus with their friends and strangers. Im going through all the colors and their answers for the colors are hiliarious. They have black red and white down pat. But blue, green and yellow, oh we gotta do some work on that part! As I am explaining yellow represents heaven, where we will get to go when we die if we have Jesus in our hearts, kid raises his hand and asks a beautiful question. "Someone told me the skreets is gold in heaven, dat true?" Be still my heart. Oh someone has been trying to teach this cute hoodrat :) about Jesus and he listened. I said "yes, and they told you right. the STREETS are gold in heaven. God made it very beautiful up there for us" Kid's reply "I can have the gold- like I can take it?" BAHAHAH. Well, the seed might have just not been planted all the way in the soil ;) I said "no baby, you cant take the gold. When we get to heaven all we are going to be worried about it worshipping God and singing to him"..quietly I hear him say to his buddy- "Imma still try and get dat gold."
• Talking to another class about the color beads- white wasnt clicking for this sweet loud bushy haired girl. I tried to teach them that Jesus makes our hearts pure again- and that is called purity. But in her ears, she heard puuuurty. Yes baby girl, Jesus makes us purty too.
• Same kid- next night: Recapping on the color beads, we get to blue (baptism, publicly proclaiming Jesus) and she raised her ever cautious hand and said "Miss Rachel, can you- can you tell me what happens when you get baptised...?" Did you hear that?!? I know there has to be a big ol bell in heaven- because when this happens, some angel has to go ring that thing and rejoice! How sweet to talk to these kids about baptism. And the cool part: they all said but baptising doesnt save you, having Jesus in your heart does. Again, remind me why I get to share this joy God?
• Having kids jump up and down to tell you the day after making salvation bracelets what the colors mean, and helping their friends when they lost the words, blessed. my. soul. God is at work. Even at a poorly decorated craft station table with a teacher who has to yell "Keep your hands to yourself in my class". 
• Seeing 20 OR MORE adults who don't go to our church- stick around and go to the adult class. Oh chills again. And the really cool part? The same Jesus who died for my white church- died for these precious African Americans from a neighborhood down the road that our youth invited to church. If that doesnt let you know God is real, I am so sorry friend, but you are missing out.
• Seeing kids ROCK out. With their songs, their hands, and I pray their hearts. It is truly special to watch music time- even the fast fun parts- these kids are dancing before the Lord, and I know he is well pleased.
• Finally, having a sweet kid in my class give me the biggest kid sized hug imaginable. Just because I loved on him and told him he was doing a great job. That. That is what it is about. Sharing Jesus with these sweet cheekies.

God had to really remind me of something as I was RUSHING around yesterday, trying to get ready in 5 minutes with the coolest hair and star painted on. It takes a lot of time to get into skinny jeans, but I am pretty sure I set the world record yesterday. I was so consumed with what I was going to wear- that I had forgotten to pray for these babies hearts- that God would send a flood over this VBS- and kids would hear the Word of God and want that inside of them. How selfish Rachel. It is not about you. Or the clothes I wear. Or the amount of hairspray I think I can use. Or the coolest rocker jewelry. Hold on, it isn't even about making sure they use up all their craft time to make these things for other people. It is COMPLETELY about giving these kids more than a week of fun, but the words to have an ETERNITY with Christ. Lord, forgive my ungrateful heart. Put in me the words to say that these kids need to hear to know you love them. 2 more nights of VBS- and I know God truly has rocked our world this week. I pray these kids do the same for God.

Heart-full

Not getting what you want can make you feel sick, but a wish that comes true is a life-giving tree. (CEV)

Hope deferred makes the heart sick, but when the desire is fulfilled, it is a tree of life. (AMP)

Hope deferred makes the heart sick,but a longing fulfilled is a tree of life. (NIV)

Proverbs 13:12

How very true are these words? The thing you want most out of life and not getting it makes your heart sick. Literally hurting and you find yourself catching your breath because the pain is almost unbearable.
Heartsick. That is the word I am sure a few of you can certainly relate to. Being so wounded and crippled by fear, uncertainty, endings and beginnings, changes and words said in a moment of emotions running away. It can break you down and hurt to the point where you cry yourself to sleep at night- hoping- praying- wishing- just knowing this can't be the end of the story. Hurt to the point that you bring on more stress to your already tired and worn heart and break it down some more.

Thankfully, there is that small 3 letter word that CHANGES everything. It is almost read over and skipped sometimes, yet it is SO important to how the game plays out. But. b-u-t. There it is. This small word changes so much.

Having heartsickness is overwhelming, BUT, thankfully, this verse does not stop there. It says when your desires, wishes, and longings are fulfilled, come true, and made real- it is a life giving tree. Your soul is restored. The depths of your unreasoning has had a revolutionary breakthrough in the hardened soil. Roots stretch far and wide, bringing you the things you need to get over this heartsickness. The parts above the surface shine bright and are made new and beautiful. Crunchy faded leaves have a resurection and color flows through their cells again. There is something different about you in that instant that your deepest desires and the things you find yourself pinning relentlessly over come to the point where they aren't dreams anymore. They are real. You just witnessed a modern day miracle.

Psalm 37:4 says  Take delight in the Lord and he will give you the desires of your heart (NIV). Delight yourself also in the Lord, and He will give you the desires and secret petitions of your heart (AMP). Do what the Lord wants,

and he will give you your heart’s desire (CEV).


I know these verses go hand in hand. Delight yourself in the Lord and he will give you the desires of your heart. When those desires aren't fulfilled it makes the heart sick, but when the desire is fulfilled, life is given back to you.

Sometimes, God sees fit to not reveal the fulfillment of the God-given desires he has placed in us because he needs us to either find that contentment in him, be refined and made more to look like Christ instead of ourselves, or because we let our earthly fleshly desires take over like a diva in a play and God is kicked off stage so our egos can have the full attention.

The desires that you have in you were put there by the Creator of feelings- the Sustainer of longings, and the Prince of Peace who calms the seas that rage within us. If he put it there, and you fully completely wholeheartedly believe that his word is true, he will make it happen at the appointed time. Not your time. Because your time is set by an imaginary calendar with fixed deadlines and appointments that can not be missed. BUT when God gives you the desires of your heart, it restores your life.

God is big. He is amazing. I still find myself at a loss for words (hard to believe, I know you just said) for what is happening around me. Good things. Great things. Absolutley God things. Desires that I had supressed and even thought I had cremated suddenly have been brought back to life like a patient who had the boards used on them. The heartbeat has been found again.

I know God is at work in me and around me. Sometimes, more often than you think, God is going to blow you away with the way he changes things up on you. It is going to hurt a little while if we don't get/have/see the things/people/blessings, but he gives us God-sized desires that only HE can make a reality. My tree was pretty much dead and chared- left with a worm eaten heart and only remnants of wilted leaf memories.
But I say unto you today, life has been restored to these dry bones. There is a smile as wide as the Milky Way on my face, and my heart is filled to the brim. Color now bursts on the screen and black and white fade into the background. The desires of my heart are starting to be fulfilled- and I am so excited. God is always at work, even when we give up on him. He put those desires in you- and He will make them real.

Hold fast to the promises of His word, and you too will find that God is the best gift giver ever.  This Bound 4 More journey is truly looking up. 625, oh happy day, this is just the beginning.

Well, its Wednesday

Our Frustrations= God's Blessings

As I was preparing to write this, I got a text from an old friend who asked me to call him when I got the chance. My friend picked up and moved to Indiana about 2 years ago- in search of more for himself. He texted me and asked for some advice. I called, and some 45 minutes later, I am understanding that God works in purposeful, even though we don't understand it, ways. I think mysterious ways too, but more so direct and intentional.

My friend asked how I was and I said- you want the long or short version- and he said let me hear the long because I am just really not wanting to focus on my life issues right now. So, in a 5 minutes spiel, I told him of the past events for the last 4 months. And then he said, I can totally understand. My sweet friend had just had his world rocked by his girlfriend breaking up with him- via text message- last night. He had been ring shopping; they dated for a year and a half. He could have called anyone in Georgia, but he chose to call me. Now you explain that. I know it is because God used my story to help my friend.

I talked to him about everything that I have learned on my own, telling him nothing anyone says is going to help, how sucky it is going to be, and that the only thing that you can rely on is Scripture. I even shared some of the verses God has shown me through all of this- and he said you don't know how much this helps. I shared Ephesians 3:30, Philippians 1:6, and Jeremiah 29:11-14. My friend had recently quit his big time railroad job because he wasnt happy, and waited 6 or 7 months to look for a new job. He just started managing a pizza place, and then the breakup happened last night. He really has nothing in Indiana. A few friends, maybe you can count them on one hand, no family, and no career.

So what do you think I told him to do? Pack it up and move it home. I told him there was no reason for him to stay there and the only way to get over the breakup was to get away from it, because being around it and all the things that remind you of it, don't help (from experience). (I did tell him before he left that he had to stop by the Vera Bradley outlet in Ft. Wayne and pick me up a few things!) And he said, after a good chuckle, because he knows my Vera request was real, he said, I just needed someone to tell me that. I needed to hear it from someone, and I am so glad you called me.

Friends, (readers), God is real. I havent talked to this friend in a LONG time- and God made him call me, of all his friends at home- because he wanted someone to be real with him. The frustration of my breakup and all my mishaps of life lately, were turned around into a blessing for someone else. All my disappointments and struggles and tears, helped someone else who is going through the same thing. I am not taking any credit for talking my friend down, it is only God who did that. I just got to be a witness.

Think about all your messups, all of the things in your life that have truly exasperated you, all the things that you were like "Really God?" or "Are you kidding me? Not now". Think about all the things you cried over. Or maybe even shook your fist at. Maybe it is frustrations with your family. A fight with a long time friend. Not getting what you wanted, like getting pregnant or losing a baby. It might be making a big ol' mess out of something that was so simple. It could be giving up everything to start a new life, only to have nothing seem to pan out. It might be the death of someone too soon, or a life altering event. Divorce. Moving. Failing a big academic test. Whatever your frustrations are, I can tell you that God, if we allow him to, uses the things that set us off, and turns it around for a blessing for someone else. We may never see these blessings with our own eyes, or hear about it with our own ears, generations later may reap the benefit of our struggles- BUT God is still at work. Even when it feels like we are in the middle of a tornado and the world is spinning by us, God still has his hand in our lives.

Take time today to thank God for the frustrations in your life that have drawn you closer to him, and use your story to bless others.

Magnitude

Ponder over this word for a moment. Magnitude.

I was somewhere at the Freedom Church Easter Play the other day and had the idea for this post. Obviously I didn't post it when I thought of it- because I really wanted to understand to the fullest extent what that word means and entails.

Magnitude.

You might think of a Richter scale to measure the size of an earthquake. I also think of something in a large capacity. Something really big. But- not just big in size. The complete essence of that thing is far more greater than what you can actually see of it.

As I watched this beautiful performance, that I had seen a few times before, this word came in to my mind. God was slowly reminding me, or maybe teaching me for the first time about the magnitude of the cross. When I say teaching me the first time, maybe I mean allowing me to see the cross in its fullest capacity, the essence of cross itself is far more greater than what we can see. The magnitude that it carries brought about emotions in me that I haven't really thought about. It is so much bigger than any other historic event to ever take place on this planet.

I am kind of a history nerd and I like to visit historic sites and learn about life the way it was long ago. I don't study it, I just like to learn about it and make trips out of my learning.

Think about it. Wars have shaped the founding and demise of countries. Illnesses have wiped out nations. Catastrophic climate changes have changed the face of the earth forever. Sailing to the depths of the end of the earth brought about new establishments and trade endeavors. This cross and this man- literally changed the course of LIFE forever.

I don't know where you stand in relation to the cross, but my earnest prayer for you is that you stand up for it to show you won't back down on your faith; to stand behind it and know that the Lord is leading you, even when you have no hope; to kneel before it and come to the feet of it and worship the Almighty True and One King; and to stand in absolute awe of it. What this man, Jesus, did for you and me on that cross so many years ago has a HUGE magnitude about it. He took your place. He took my place. Every drop of his blood was shed on and with purpose. Purpose to defeat not only death and the grave, but to defeat the sin that we commit. To cover ALL of my wrongs, even the ones I run to in the secret. To perfect me to be able to even come close to the cross. To allow me to stand before my Creator and truly experience worship in its purest form. His blood was not spilled on accident- he chose this death for me- and for you- and for generations to come.

Tomorrow is Good Friday. I'm sure people wonder why it is called "Good" when something so terrible, so outlandishly awful, so repulsive, so intense and horrific happened, but I say unto you- it is good because you and I now have direct access to God. Christ took on fullness of man- while still exhibiting fullness of God- to pardon sin- once and for all. It is good because I have a Savior- who loves me just as I am- no matter what I have done. He takes me in his arms and says to me "I love you, even when- even when no one else does dear child. You are mine. No one can take that from you". It is Good Friday, because what happened on Sunday is amazing- and good always precedes better. Mother Goose said "Good, Better, Best never rests until Good be Better and Better Best". Though not some grammaticaly correct statement, it is pure truth. Our sins were nailed to the cross (good); Christ died a shameful death to conquer death for me and you (better) and Praise the Lord he ROSE AGAIN on Sunday (best). He is LIVING BREATHING God! He is Alive, and I am forever grateful he chose me.

Today and Tomorrow, realize the magnitude of what Jesus did on the cross, in the grave, and through his Resurection.

A Happy Post

I decided to post something fun and happy for once. All my writings lately have been so downcast. My coworker said she cried when she read my blog about my meltdown. So, with that being said, we work on a happy post.

What are something that truly make you happy? I have been thinking about this today and here are a few things:

-When sweet Daisy Griffin won't go to anyone else in church but me- and even faces her 3 yr old shyness in the face and walks down the entire church aisle to come sit with Waychel
-When Mowgli rolls all over my dirty towels. I think I belly laugh every time. That is her purest form of happiness
- When Kroger gives me FREE product coupons- and last night I got an organic protein bar and meatless "chicken" tenders for FREE- hello Vegan week bucket list!
- When I can easily fit into a size I never dreamed of fitting in. Yes, it is a confidence booster.

-When I find really cheap nail polish- in awesome colors. Right now I have a "Show me some skin" mani- I should paint my nails more often. I think that brightens the mood.
-MAKEUP. Oh man- I could write a book on this. I love love love eyeshadows and lips colors. Working for Estee Lauder got me addicted. I got 200 eyeshadows for Christmas- and I use the pallet everrrryday. I like talking makeup, I like doing my own and others makeup, and I just like looking at makeup. Obsessed.
- Accessories. Oh. My. Word. My college boyfriend told me that I could make a white t shirt look good because I paid so much attention to the details of my accesories. I never leave the house without earrings. If I do, Im sick and didnt notice!

-There arent many "foods" that make me happy. Used to be a lot of sweets, but since I rarely eat them anymore, I dont really have a "favorite food". I can honestly say I don't really see food the same way I did. But if I had to choose, a really pretty salad can make my day better.
-When I have 3-5 little kids running up to me at church begging for a hug and some attention. Not many people can say every kid in the church loves on them, but I can. And that melts my heart that these precious kids think I am someone special.

-When my former students still come by and visit- and ask me hard questions about life- and I get to share my faith with them. It is in those instances I can feel God at work in me the most.
-When I get to be a guest speaker. I love people and I love talking to them. The BCM speaking night was so much fun- and I felt at peace about it, and had a great time sharing and could feel the Lord moving in me.
-When people get excited about their health. When the light bulb goes off and they get it. It makes my job a little easier and better.

These are just some of the truly happy moments in my life. "Hook" would say- where is your happy place Peter? Think happy thoughts." and I would encourage you to do the same.