Finally Figured It Out

I have been being true to myself about what I posted on here the other day. I have been keeping quiet and learning to take in things around me instead of reacting to them. The secret life does have its perks. No one knows your business. No one can respond to your thoughts/opinions inappropriately, and no one can judge you because you have been quiet.

Interesting. You observe more when you remain in the quiet. I have also come to realize that you don't get weighed down as much, because you just have your problems to deal with, not anyone else's. Recluse. I might take this on for a while. It's funny though- people notice when you go from being one way to another- or I should at least say- a few people noticed. Not that I am doing this for anyone but myself, but when someone made a comment about me being "upset kinda off', I almost wanted to smile, because I had finally figured it out. The secret of living not in the open with everyone to gaze into your business- or hear about it because you won't shut up about your life and all the stuff it brings with it.

I am learning that the world is a cruel place. I am also learning that I contribute to the negativity that makes this world cruel. I am also finding out that the world revolving around me will not, has not, nor ever will be.

Last night I did a lesson about "Comeback Kids" from the Bible. People who had/made a big mess with/out of their lives- and God turned their life around for good (Romans 8:28). I read this quote on a forum and it is too good not to share with you.

"Don’t allow yourself to be completely engrossed in that mess. It does not matter where you are or how big a mess your life is today. God has a comeback plan for you. ...Refuse to accept a setback! ...He will preserve your life in order to preserve the purpose for your life."- Valentine Egbudiwe

I have made a bunch of messes in this life. Seems like for the past two years I have made huge messes with friends. I have- and I take owenership of my actions and reactions. God has been so faithful though. The friendships that mattered have been resolved and the ones that didn't/haven't- I have peace about them. 

God has a comeback for me. I do not know what it is- or can't even fathom the comeback he has planned for me, but I know that part of it is living in this secret quiet life. He has brought me this far, because the purpose for my life is still at work. So as I remain in the quiet- pray for me- that I will find my purpose and that this new life will bring about some of the healing that I have been desperately needing.